rat
A missionary who informs on rulebreakers, usually with the hope of advancement. (Usually with the reward of advancement, come to think of it.)

Also used as a verb to indicate informing on another missionary in such a fashion.
 
Reformed Egyptian
The supposed language, consisting of "the learning of the Jews and the language of the Egyptians" (1 Nephi 1:2), from which Joseph Smith purportedly translated the Book of Mormon by means of the Urim and Thummim.

Uh-huh. And they say reading the Harry Potter books makes it difficult for children to distinguish fantasy from reality . . .
 
release
The official end to any calling in the L.D.S. Church.

In particular, a missionary must obtain a release before being able to engage in any of the pursuits which are proscribed during his term of service. A release can be either honorable or dishonorable -- though in the latter case, the missionary in question has probably not been very concerned about what pursuits are proscribed and what aren't.
 
Relief Society
An auxiliary women's organization of the L.D.S. Church, which teaches homemaking skills, cultural appreciation, and spiritual awareness.

Also, a perjorative term which can be applied to any closed conversation between a group of Mormon women; e.g., "I wonder what those gals are plotting in their little Relief Society over there."
 
repo
Underworld slang for "repossess"; e.g., "If you're late with that protection money, Father Savalas, then Old Nick here's going to be forced to repo Linda Blair."
 
Restored Gospel
The teachings of Joseph Smith, Jr., purported to be the same gospel taught by Jesus Christ, free of the acculmulated corruptions of nearly two millennia.

A bit heavy on the Masonry, though.
 
returned missionary
A young man or woman who has come home after receiving an honorable release from his or her mission. The term is applicable for the duration of the subject's youth.

The male of the species is characterized by a propensity to debate any doctrinal issue from a position absolute authority, to pursue eligible young women ruthlessly and prayerfully, and to resist moving out of his parents' basement.

The female of the species is apt never to view male authority with much seriousness again.

Often shortened to r.m.

See also Peter Priesthood.
 
r.m.
See returned missionary.
 
road trip
A prohibited activity wherein a missionary leaves his assigned area and visits a distant area, either inside or outside the boundaries of his mission. Often involves unhooking the car's odometer, so the extra mileage will not be reported to the mission office.

Legendary status is automatically assigned to missionaries who successfully complete a road trip to either Disneyland or Walt Disney World, preferrably from outside California or Florida.
 
runaway
Slang for a missionary who leaves or attempts to leave his mission before his allotted period of service is up, usually by sneaking away without telling anyone -- which is really the only practical way to accomplish it.
 

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