August 2002 | Inhuman Swill | William Shunn
Inhuman Swill : August 2002

I'm a friggin' genius!

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I was pointed here by [info]pould, of course....

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What this house was missing

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I thought I had misheard Monday when Laura told me.

"What?" I whooped.

"Brian, our hairdresser, has offered us an upright piano," she repeated. "Free. All we have to do is get it moved. Should I turn him down?"

"No, no, no, no, no!"

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Life timer

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I stayed up very late Monday night configuring my brand-new Dell laptop. I was working in the living room, which happens to be where Laura and I plug our cell phones in to charge at night.

It was around two in the morning, that liquid hour when the night begins to turn unreal, that I closed down the laptop and stepped toward the bathroom. I'm not sure what it was that drew my eye to my cellphone, sitting in its accustomed spot on the edge of one of the bookshelves, but there seemed to be a message displayed on the tiny screen.

I picked up the phone. It read:

Life timer 0011:55
I shivered and put the phone down fast. Then I picked it up again and pushed the "Clear" button, which returned me to the main screen. The odd thing was, the main screen indicated that the keys were locked. The screen shouldn't have been doing anything, as far as I can tell.
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A pint of bitter

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Scott, Tony, and Chaos present The Flaming Sword of BITTER. Drink up.

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Polygeek quiz

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Thanks to [info]pould for pointing this one out . . .

You are 71% geek
You are a geek. Good for you! Considering the endless complexity of the universe, as well as whatever discipline you happen to be most interested in, you'll never be bored as long as you have a good book store, a net connection, and thousands of dollars worth of expensive equipment. Assuming you're a technical geek, you'll be able to afford it, too. If you're not a technical geek, you're geek enough to mate with a technical geek and thereby get the needed dough. Dating tip: Don't date a geek of the same persuasion as you. You'll constantly try to out-geek the other.
Take the Polygeek Quiz at
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There's a diner called Orloff's on Columbus between 65th and 66th. I used to work near there, and I have many happy memories of having eaten artery-clogging lunches and dinners there. I also used to pick up a bagel with cream cheese and tomato there most mornings.

Unfortunately, it's in the same building as an LDS meetinghouse, and now that meetinghouse is being turned into a temple. Orloff's is closed. The moneychangers have all been turned out:

LDS Plan Temple in Manhattan
I know it's not about me, but I can't help but feel like the Mormons will keep fucking with me until I die.
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South Park Bilmo

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South Park Bilmo
Thanks to [info]pould for pointing out where to make one of these . . .

Now create your own South Park character!
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Sunny day, my ass

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I recall that in [info]ricperrott's journal a few weeks back, we were discussing Sesame Street's bold move into South Africa. I pointed out that they had made an even bolder move into Israel and Palestine a few years ago.

Well, now they've decided that political realities mean it's no longer possible to show Israelis and Palestinians interacting on the show. In fact, they've changed the name from Sesame Street to Sesame Stories to reflect the change.

Here's the New York Times story:

Israeli-Palestinian Battles Intrude on "Sesame Street"
Sweeping the clouds away, my ass. The clouds are sweeping Sesame Street away.
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DHTML pop-up menus

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Over the weekend I finished up a new cosmetic enhancement to the ol' Web site—pop-up menus in DHTML. Running the mouse over a section icon now brings up a menu of the features in that section. Click around and let me know if you find any problems. I'm particularly curious to see what happens in pre-DHTML versions of Netscape and IE.

(The menus don't work on my pages at, sadly, because any JavaScript in your journal styles gets disabled nowadays.)

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My friend Shana emailed me this article from the New York Times last Wednesday:

How hot is it in New York? Take a whiff
It's not as hot today as it was then, but the article is still relevant.
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