This 30-year-old article can't tell you what it's like to be a missionary

This Deseret News article from Saturday, February 28, 1987, can tell you all about what got me arrested earlier that week, but it can't tell you what it was actually like to be a reluctant 19-year-old Mormon missionary in the wilds of Canada in the mid- to late '80s. And hey, it's the Deseret News, so it wouldn't tell you the truth about that even if it could.

No, for that you need my award-nominated memoir, The Accidental Terrorist: Confessions of a Reluctant Missionary, and there's still time to get in on plenty of great sales! While supplies last, grab a signed and personalized edition for only $19.95 in hardcover or $11.95 in trade paperback,—with free shipping in the United States. Or get the ebook edition for the ridiculously low price of 99 cents!

Not only that, but you can even enter at Goodreads to win one of ten free copies of the trade paperback. But hurry! Like a train to Darjeeling, the days of these sales are limited.