Inhuman Swill : December 2002

Merry KISSMAS

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Two hours to departure.

My errand to rent a truck and pick up Laura's Christmas present is complete. I've returned to discover the coolest Christmas card ever, sent no doubt by our friend Angus who works for KISS. Yes, the rock band. It's a card that says "Merry KISSMAS," and inside are the signatures of Paul, Gene, Peter, and Ace.

Okay, the signatures are printed directly on the card, but it's still pretty damn cool.

The sick adventurer

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We leave today on our secret adventure, so I likely won't be back here until Christmas. Yes, Laura's taking me on a Christmas adventure somewhere, I know not where. She made all the travel arrangements, packed my bags and everything. The car takes us to the airport at 3:30. I guess I'll learn our destination when we get there.

Unfortunately, owing to not having been able to find my knit cap yesterday morning and walking all over in the cold wind, I have awakened this morning with sore throat, stuffy nose, and watery eyes. Nothing puts a dent in an adventure like an adventurer with a cold. Curses!

I saw a pair of new commercials from the Office of National Drug Control Policy during 24 last night. Anyone else see them?

http://www.mediacampaign.org/mg/television.html

Watch "Ploy" first, then watch "Okay." This is the most blatant example of doublespeak I've ever seen in television commercials. The message of these commercials is basically "It's true because we said it's true." It almost doesn't matter to me whether or not drug money actually does fund terrorism. What terrifies me is the technique the government is using to make its point.

This is what the government thinks of us, that we should believe what they say because they say it. Subtler forms of this have been going on in America since its founding, of course, but this is the first time I've been literally chilled by an example of it on my television screen. I had the feeling last night that I was watching a line being crossed. I had the feeling I was looking Big Brother in the eye, or vice versa.

(And doesn't that second fellow look a lot like Dick Cheney? Dick Cheney and Vince Vaughn, that's who they look like.)

Plus ça change

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Nearly 1100 quarters, over 1200 dimes, about 700 nickels, and more than 1600 pennies. It weighs about 40 pounds, it comes to $446.73, and it's what I hauled to Commerce Bank this morning, where you can cash in your coins without a fee at the Penny Arcade machine. And that's not all of it—Laura hauled in $300 and change on Saturday.

Thank God there was no transit strike this morning.

Technical difficulties

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According to this quiz, I'm really Frank Herbert, which frankly explains a lot.

Yes!

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From the Steely Dan newsletter:

We wanted you to be the first to know: The next Steely Dan album is all but in the can. Total recording time came in at a little over a year.

We've started a page for the little beauty at http://steelydan.com/newcd.html
That'll be the place to go for further details as they become available.

I'm so excited I can barely cope—I'm sizzling like an isotope.

Switch

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